Monday, 6 September 2010

Pulling yourself/myself together

People who have read my blog may know that I've had some struggles during the past year. Well, the struggles continue and sometimes I think things are just getting worse.

It's so annoying when everyone is telling you everything is gonna be alright, when you just feel it won't. People tell you to stay positive, to look forward into your future. But that's the problem..... I feel like I don't really have anything to stay positive for, things just seem to be going wrong all around me. I really don't know what to do anymore to turn those thoughts around.

I don't feel like I've got any friends or that things are going well for me. I know I've got a few friends, but yet have this feeling of being alone. How does one pull themselves together when you don't know how?

I love working on my webdesign course and learning more about it, but it doesn't make me feel better. I miss the real contact which you have when your around friends. But how do you make friends when you need to pay close attention to your finances? You can't really go out the door.

All these things and more just make it really difficult to pull yourself together. I try to occupy myself all the time, but that doesn't mean that I'm actually feeling better. I know that I'm wearing a mask from time to time, just because I don't want to be the person who feels bad and complains all the time. I wonder......how many others with me are wearing masks?

This blog isn't about interests or discussion topics. This blog is about me, about my life, about my thoughts. I needed to clear my head. I'm curious to see the comments on this blog.

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